The Awesome Men Who Stare At Goats

I finally saw 'The Men Who Stare At Goats' today, and it is legitimately one of the greatest movies ever made. I can't even begin to properly explain how awesome it is, but I'll give it my best [and fail, start drinking scotch and complain that life "Isn't what it used to be"]. Firstly, considering the books and websites I've been reading lately, the fact that it's about psychics and hippies is so coincidental that it's not. Clearly it is a message from the universe, although I was a bit busy laughing my ass directly off of myhindquarters to get just what it was saying, but I'll figure it out. [How complicated could a message from the Universe be, right?? ... Right??]

I don't want to ruin the movie either, but I don't see how I can amange not too.... Ah to hell with it, I'll just talk about things I liked and fuck to spoilers. [Also: SPOILER ALERT] The first funny/awesome thing in the movie for me was when some sergeant explained to some commander [or something like that, I don't give a crap about their rank] explained that the communists were investigating psychics because they'd heard America was, but they weren't, but now that the Ruskies were they should too. ["They think the story about it being a story is just a story."]

Plus there are two quotes from near the end that are just endless points of humour or rants. Like a subliminally messaged soung titled "Don't get drunk before operatiing heavy machine guns." Seriously?? For a fucking army base?? Are there really soldiers who need to be told these things?? If so, then WHY THE FUCK ARE THEY ALLOWED TO BE SOLDIERS when they clearly have the mental capacities of born-retarded duck who was treated to a lobotomy.

And when two of the characters fly off into the sunset in a helicopter at the end, the main characters voice-over explains that "Their helicopter crashed, maybe because of a hostile RPG, or maybe coz that's just what happens when people fly a helicopter when they're tripping on acid." Best fucking quote ever! Also that sounds fun. I want to do that.

And when [earlier on] they look into a room with a man being subjected to nothing but the barney the dinosaur theme song, and it is explained as "The Dark Side". I fully endorse this point of view. Barney is the Agent Of All That Is Evil [equal rank with Glenn Beck], and I have known this for many years, yet others for some reason seem to think this ridiculous. I have no idea why.

Freaking see this movie if you have not. Also keep in mind: Marney is evil.