An Adventure In Crappy Second-Handedness

There's a little second-hand store down the road from me that I walk past every know and then [but a lot when Uni is on; it's on the way to the bus stop], and because I literally had NOTHING more interesting to do, I went and did some perusing of it today. Basically it's split into two rooms, one for clothes, and one for everything else. I completely went by the clothes and into the other room. Clothes have never been something I'm interested in, even though I cold clearly dress many people [including some of you, readers] far better than they dress themselves. I just can't be bothered.

So I walk into the room of objects of all shapes and sizes, and see if there's a pattern I can use. Immediately noticing that about 50% of the whole damn room was all old diningware, and crappy china, and little boxes that smelt funny, I looked at basically every last one of them. A good deal of the stuff there actually looked kind of nice, but the problem was that most of them smelt freaky.

There were these empty bottles that looked real fancy, but it turned out they were empty perfume bottles that wouldn' be opened and smelt of some weird ass perfume. The scent reminded me of something that a really saucy woman in the 50's would wear when she was out seducing rich men. And with those images firmly ingraining themselves in my mind, I continued on.

The next thing that caught my eye was a tall, jaggedy glass bottle, you know those kinds with the coloured sands in them?? The patterns of the sands in this one were really kool, like curved, colourful teeth in the sides. I'm not sure why I didn't buy it, it was only $3 and it didn't even smell horrible. I guess I'd forgotten about it shortly after I put it down. I forget things sometimes, so what?? What're you, perfect??

Anyway, on a shelf just below that was a really big square glass bottle with a glass stopper. It was one of those ones with the spikey square pattern on them and look like they're meant hold like 300 year old brandy in them or something. Looked freaking awesome. Totally purchased.

They were the only things of note in that half of the room [no wonder there's never anyone in there] so I turned to the other half, and saying that my spirits were lifted would be such a horrible, horrible overstatement that I would have committed myself to an institution for the criminally insane. It was all absolute garbage, in the sense that I'm sure a good portion of it was stolen from the tip or people rubbish bins.

There were crummy old bags, shoddy old toasters and microwaves, basically all verieties of the junk you'd have lying around your own home [or next to your own trash cans], just all of the crap in the store was already junkified for your convenience. And then there were shelves with bedsheets and quilts. You know how people use the term "pre-loved" for second hand goods?? To hell with that crap.

Also, saucy grandma.